How about some extra security to keep intruders at bay which you can also discretely pack in your pocket or a very small bag? No, we’re not talking about a can of pepper spray or that lipstick taser from Despicable Me 2, but we are talking about something that will serve essentially the same purpose as a chair wedged under the door handle from the inside with a much smaller profile. And guess what, we came across it in one of those Sky Mall catalogs that are full of so much useless garbage (sorry, it’s true; no, I don’t need another freakin’ garden gnome or yeti or squirrel sculpture). Lo and behold, those catalogs always seem to have a couple of gems, though.

Say hello to the DoorJammer, a small portable door-stopper security device that will ideally enable you to reinforce even the most pathetic of doors. Easily carried, this fantastic device comes with some newfound peace-of-mind. Slide the padded bottom flange of the device under the door’s bottom rail and then extend the opposing foot into the floor using the telescoping screw in the hinged leg of the DoorJammer. Physics takes care of the rest, converting horizontal into vertical force given the angles employed in the product design (thanks engineers!) and, along with a foot pad, keeping the device from slipping out.

Vendor product photo.

There’s nothing worse than not getting any sleep because you’ve just checked into the crappiest hotel in Billings, Montana at three-something in the morning after driving so many hours you’re nearly hallucinating and the hotel clerk and other guests are not inspiring any confidence whatsoever (nor are the sheets, mattress, door, or really any aspect of the place) in anything other than the belief that this hotel is most often utilized to commit crimes. Help, DoorJammer!

Boyfriend over? Need to keep your parents out of your room? It’s DoorJammer time. Backpacking the world solo? It’s DoorJammer time for you, too. Are those 43 locks on your Brooklyn apartment door just not enough? DoorJammer the mofo. Just don’t forget to remove it when it’s time to take little Darwin the wonderdog out for a tinkle and some sun.